Enough With Just Respecting Life - It's Time to Grieve Life To Affect Change

Simcha Fisher wrote a good article for the Register this week "Abortion Is a Men's Issue." I agree with her. It is. She talks about men using their strength and control, their power. She calls us out and that we should use it to protect. Men like to hear that. Men like strength, (insert Tim Allen gruff bark...) Men like to think we're in control and we definitely want respect and enjoy it upon receipt. I get it. I'm a man.

But men, (and ladies), we've been duped. We've been fed for decades it's Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice. Respect Life vs. Respecting the Right of a Woman. Well I'm here to tell you to stop it. Just stop it. It's not enough to just "Respect Life." The problem my dear fellow Christians, is that we're not taught to grieve for life, especially us men. We're not taught how to feel and express our pain. We should be tough and "show no emotion." That's why we lean towards neutral. We're taught that retaining control of emotions and acting neutral - as if it doesn't affect us - or that we're ok - that it will likely give others strength. WRONG. We're taught men don't cry; men just deal with it. Even in our current society, where men are being emasculated from strength and control, these thoughts and perceptions prevail. Everywhere you look, if you really look, we're being told by women and men alike, to essentially, "suck it up and be a man." But, we're never taught, we're never shown, we're never told it's OK to grieve and how to grieve for life. Well guess what?

AHHH, but we have been told it's ok to grieve. We men just never pay much attention to it. Pity. You know who was the best and most powerful griever of all time? A Man. His name?

Jesus.

You know what He was able to bring forth from that grieving?

LIFE. Not just strength and control and power.

You wanna know what HE did?

Read the story of Lazarus again. John 11:1-44. I quote verses 32-35:

"When Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said to him, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. When Jesus saw her weeping and the Jews who had come with her weeping, he became perturbed and deeply troubled and said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to him, “Sir, come and see.”

And Jesus wept." PAUSE.

Luke 19:41 - Jesus upon entering Jerusalem Palm Sunday, "As he drew near, he saw the city and wept over it." Right after that he got angry and drove the money lenders and merchants out of the Temple. PAUSE.

Luke 22:42 - Jesus in the garden. Jesus was begging his heavenly Father to take this cup from him and He was, "in such agony and he prayed so fervently that his sweat became like drops of blood falling on the ground. When he rose from prayer and returned to his disciples, he found them sleeping from grief. He said to them, “Why are you sleeping? Get up and pray that you may not undergo the test." PAUSE AGAIN. The apostles had grief? (LOL, never noticed that before.)

Jesus ends his humanly grief on the cross with final words, "Father forgive them for the know not what they do," and "Father, into your hands I commend my spirit." REFLECT.

Are you familiar with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross' "On Death and Dying" 5 (some say 7) stages of grief? I included the link there for a quick refresher for those who hit snooze for that part of Psych 101. I had to remind myself too, don't worry. We'll go with 5 for the sake of brevity. Step 1 - Shock and Denial. Step 2 - Anger. Step 3 - Bargaining and Guilt. Step 4 - Depression. Step 5 - Acceptance and Hope.

Anyone notice any similarities of these steps to Jesus' life? I found it rather striking that the only three times in the Bible where it really mentions Jesus grieving, if you combine them, He goes through stages, of a kind, in His life long before any psychologist came up with the theory. Through God the Son's grieving for life, what did we witness? Jesus exhibited emotion, strong, powerful emotion. He prayed, He took command over death, and He demonstrated hope for all, freeing us to return to our heavenly Father. BAM! Pretty awesome example, but a pretty tall order, isn't it MEN?

So now, Men, what came from all these teary eyes? Jesus weeping for Lazarus? Raised him from the dead. Yeah, LIFE. What sprung forth from Jesus weeping for Jerusalem and dying on the cross? Yeah, LIFE. Not to mention a whole new Church of believers. Through grief and suffering, Jesus brought forth new LIFE and became the champion. A true MEN'S champion.

Jesus showed it to us. And it's not about how men can simply just stand up and show control and power. Ladies, it's just not that easy for us to automatically show that "power" like you might think. So, how do men actually realistically make this abortion thing our issue?

MEN, you need to GRIEVE for the babies that are lost. TRULY GRIEVE. Be shocked and appalled by it, and not just the babies, be shocked and appalled by culture when it doesn't promote life, when it doesn't care for life, when it doesn't do everything to educate life to bring that life closer to God. Men, ohhhhh let it stir up a righteous anger within you, one that makes you want to personally drive the culture of death straight out and back to hell. Then pray. Pray for strength, pray for zeal, pray for life. Whether you've had guilt from standing on the sidelines, from not doing enough, or from not having an opinion... whatever... Pray for a culture that gains immense joy from life.

Then weep. Think about what could have been. Think about the lives, all the lives that have been lost for any senseless reason. Think about what joy and ideas and spirit those lives could have brought the world. Then ride that final stage of grief right on home, and hold high throughout the hope that God has given you, the personal strength and power He's growing inside of you to take command, to affect change.

So go do something about it. Go urge your politicians to embrace life. Go pray more for God to bring the love of life to those who need it most. Go to Mass more and offer it up to Him. Go stand outside an abortion clinic and pray, or get trained on how to sidewalk counsel. Walk for Life. Participate in a Life Chain. Love your wives. Make babies. Raise them and educate them in a culture of life. We'll outnumber the naysayers someday right? If you're single, go hang out with people who grieve for life and fight for it. Go write about it. Just don't sit there. Our bodies don't get stronger by sitting on our asses. You think our souls do by sitting on the spiritual sidelines? Go ask St. Michael to toss you a sword and shield and buckle up gents.

Yeah. That's how we get stronger boys. That's how we champion.